The imaginary passion stays alive precisely by avoiding real contact with its object

Evidence

A decent married woman of the better social class suffers from “nervous anxiety” and is predisposed to depressions. One evening during the performance at the opera she falls in love with the tenor. His singing suffuses her with a strange warmth. She becomes the singer’s fanatic admirer. Thenceforth she does not miss a single performance in which he appears. She obtains his photograph, she dreams of him, and once she sent him an imposing bouquet of roses with the inscription: “From a grateful unknown admirer!” She even goes so far as to write him a letter … This letter she also signs, “From an unknown admirer!” but she keeps at a distance. An occasion unexpectedly arises, making it possible for her to meet this singer at a social gathering. She decides very promptly that she will not go. She does not care to become personally acquainted with him. She does not require closer contact. She is happy to be able to love so warmly and still remain a faithful wife! — Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex, 1613

Categorization

• XREF: Parallels later discussion of the adolescent girl’s imaginary loves and the ‘mystification’ of the love object; echoes Sartre’s bad faith. — connects to: Art redeems existence precisely by not striving to attain being; Keeping a wild creature’s body and keeping its love are mutually exclusive — , A Year of World Stories, 11832
• FICTION: The structure of a love sustained by refusing actual contact is a rich narrative device for character-driven fiction.

Broader Connections

• Art redeems existence precisely by not striving to attain being #complicates (0.80)
• Keeping a wild creature’s body and keeping its love are mutually exclusive #exemplifies (0.75) — , A Year of World Stories, 11832