Passive and inverted constructions even turn inanimate objects into culpable agents

Evidence

When someone at Kodak botched the development of twelve rolls of prized film, the photographer was informed that “the films were involved in an unusual laboratory experience.” Even inanimate objects are sometimes turned into agents. Here is a driver explaining to police how he managed to demolish a telephone pole: “The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.” — Albert Bandura, Moral Disengagement, 383

Categorization

• CANDY: The ‘telephone pole was approaching’ driver excuse is a genuinely funny, shareable one-liner about linguistic evasion.
• SEED: An article on corporate and bureaucratic euphemism could mine more real examples of institutional doublespeak.